Charming Bitch

We are OTR truckers with a keen interest in, and avid devotion to, navel gazing. Well that used to be true, now only D is driving as I am at home with 4 (count 'em 4) kids and being treated for Stage 2 Ovarian Cancer. Where for art thou did the 4 kids come from, you ask? Keep reading.

In my present incarnation I drive a truck, a big one (with 18, count 'em 18) wheels. Despite the many protests to the contrary you're sure to eventually encounter in this blog, I love my job and my only regret is that I didn't start doing it ten or twelve years ago. It would have saved me a lot of grief.

So, as I found what I am happiest doing all these many years later, there is also plenty to write about how I passed those other decades. I have been, at various times, a Human Resources Admin (my whole job was firing people), a CSR (customer service rep) for both a bank and a utility company, a taxi driver (owner/op thank you very much) and a phone sex operator. Good times, all of them. At other times, just to give you a heads up, I have been so wretchedly depressed I couldn't find the energy or inclination to get out of bed in the morning.

You will learn more than you ever wanted to know about all of these endeavors, if you stick around long enough for me to actually follow through and make this blog interesting.

Quick overview of what you'll find here:

2005: Great except for round 1 with MRSA infection and Katrina eating my whole house.

2006: Banner year that included getting pregnant (and not finding out until 10-12 weeks along), getting married to my baby daddy and giving birth in September to Jackson. He was doubtlessly the most precious and perfect baby in all the land but sadly he died a little over a month later. It's been incredibly hard as I think there isn't a comparable loss to that of a child and if there is, in fact, anything worse I hope we never experience it or even hear of it, to be honest.

2007: Today though we (Deels and I) are doing our level best to get on with getting on. My sister and her family have already moved to the North West and we will be following them (along with my parents) shortly. Hurricane Katrina fucked us up but good and it's time for a change, as much as I do dearly and truly love the South.

Deels and I are back on the road (he's a trucker, too) and that will be evidenced amply with terrible quality camera phone pictures until we upgrade to a proper digital camera. I also love my new bras with what is likely an unnatural passion. Plenty of proof posted already and you can expect regular updates.

And now, as of October 2007, another update. We made the move to the Pacific Northwest in April. This was after I quit my job (all dramatic like, heh) in March and we bought a house (one mile from my sister) site unseen in Vancouver. Moving was great, initially, and things seemed to be, finally on the upswing. I started therapy and then the final blow to our combined dignity was (another) unplanned pregnancy that ended in miscarriage and with Deels getting a (planned for but obviously delayed) vasectomy for his birthday in June. The miscarriage made me again sick with systemic MRSA and a hostage to a port and intravenous drug therapy for months on end. About this time my sister went into inpatient rehab and we had a truck-ton of responsibility for her three kids during that time. Good times, had by all, right?

Moving forward, again, our lovely house was still quite lovely and still quite a deal but our neighbors and neighborhood left much to be desired ( like fewer racists) and we have now sold the house and moved to Portland. Currently, we're in a terrific studio, nursing my spider bite and contemplating buying another house in a few months. We're also committed to expanding our family via foster to adopt in the next year.

Yes. It's been quite a ride thus far but hold on tight, y'all. It's only going to get better from here. Promise and swear.

Oh. How naive I was, it is almost cloying. Yes, things have gotten better in some ways, sure but MAN does our life look different than we anticipated.

Picking up from the studio in Portland, we separated in January of 2008 because D had an affair. I know, right? Was horrid. But we lived apart, fixed ourselves, worked too, too much and made things right again. Just in time for my dad to break not one but BOTH ankles in March 2008. And for my sister to chronically relapse, regardless of three trips to rehab in one lonely year. Her husband was also revealed to have a substance abuse problem his own self so we got guardianship of the kids and hauled ass back to Mississippi. Just after getting there, we discovered my former sister in law (I know, I know you need a chart to keep up with this shit) is in the throes of meth addiction so her 14 year old daughter lives with us now, too.

You tired yet? Fuck I am just updating this piece, dang. So. Yeah. Back to Mississippi, moved twice in a MONTH (w/o D being there either time, btw, b/c I AM BAD-ASS) and how we've settled into a 104 year old house that is both lovely and awful, is drafty as all fuck but full of so much character we think we'll stay here awhile.

I mean unless the cancer means we'll have to move. Ha! Gotcha. Yeah, shortly after all this kid collecting, moving cross country and such, I was diagnosed with Stage 2 Ovarian Cancer. It sucks, hard, especially b/c D is back over the road and home really sporadically but it was caught early, is treatable and a year from now will be just another fucked up memory buried amongst so much joy.

So. Yeah. That's us and our family (C-14 girl S-6 girl H-5 boy J-3inJanuary-boy) - We rock pretty hard given the circumstances, I think.